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TL;DR: Live stream Fritz vs. Zverev in the 2024 US Open for free on 9Now or TVNZ+. Access these free streaming platforms from anywhere in the world with ExpressVPN.

The US Open quarter finals are here, promising exciting matchups between some of the best players in the world. With the likes of Djokovic and Alcaraz already out of the tournament, a lot of players will see this year's US Open as there for the taking. Fritz and Zverev will both believe they can win their first Grand Slam.

If you want to watch Fritz vs. Zverev in the 2024 US Open for free from anywhere in the world, we have all the information you need.

How to watch Fritz vs. Zverev in the 2024 US Open for free

Fans can live stream the 2024 US Open for free on these platforms:

• Australia — 9Now

• New Zealand — TVNZ+

These streaming services are geo-blocked, but anyone from around the world can access these sites with a VPN. These handy tools can hide your real IP address (digital location) and connect you to secure servers in other countries, meaning you can unblock 9Now and TVNZ+ from anywhere in the world.

Access free live streams of the 2024 US Open by following these simple steps:

1. Subscribe to a streaming-friendly VPN (like ExpressVPN)

2. Download the app to your device of choice (the best VPNs have apps for Windows, Mac, iOS, Android, Linux, and more)

3. Open up the app and connect to a server in Australia or New Zealand

4. Visit 9Now or TVNZ+

5. Watch Fritz vs. Zverev in the 2024 US Open for free from anywhere in the world

Opens in a new window Credit: ExpressVPN ExpressVPN (1-Year Subscription + 3 Months Free) $99.95 only at ExpressVPN (with money-back guarantee) Get Deal

The best VPNs for streaming are not free, but leading VPNs do tend to offer deals such as free-trial periods or money-back guarantees. By leveraging these offers, you can access free live streams of Fritz vs. Zverev without actually spending anything. This clearly isn't a long-term solution, but it gives you enough time to watch every US Open match before recovering your investment.

What is the best VPN for the US Open?

ExpressVPN is the best service for bypassing geo-restrictions to stream the US Open for free, for a number of reasons:

• Servers in 105 countries including Australia and New Zealand

• Easy-to-use app available on all major devices including iPhone, Android, Windows, Mac, and more

• Strict no-logging policy so your data is always secure

• Fast connection speeds

• Up to eight simultaneous connections

• 30-day money-back guarantee

A one-year subscription to ExpressVPN is on sale for $99.95 and includes an extra three months for free — 49% off for a limited time. This plan also includes a year of free unlimited cloud backup and a generous 30-day money-back guarantee.

Live stream Fritz vs. Zverev in the 2024 US Open for free from anywhere in the world with ExpressVPN.

TL;DR: Prepare for your next job with beginner to advanced courses on Excel, Word, Access, Outlook, and PowerPoint with the Ultimate Microsoft Office 2021/365 Training Bundle, available now for just £30.38 (reg. £341.08). 

Opens in a new window Credit: StreamSkill The Ultimate Microsoft Office 2021/365 Training Bundle £30.38 at the Mashable Shop
£341.08 Save £310.70 Get Deal

Don't let that "proficient in Microsoft Office" on your resume be a lie. Knowing how to format a spreadsheet or compose a document in Word is just the beginning. The more advanced functions take a little more effort to learn, but you might be able to save time on tasks like data organisation, formatting, and more when you enroll in the Ultimate Microsoft Office 2021/365 Training Bundle. This pack of seven courses goes from beginner to intermediate and advanced lessons for Word, Excel, PowerPoint, Outlook, and Access, and it's on sale for just £30.38 (down from £341.08). 

Excel beginners welcome

If you don't know how to construct functional lookup formulas in Excel or use Excel tables to structure data in a way that's easy to update, have a seat. That's not even the advanced Excel course. Beginners can start with lessons on Excel keyboard shortcuts, basic formulas, and simple functions. Once you're ready for the intermediate course, that's where you can find tips to help you design better spreadsheets. 

The advanced Excel course is your chance to learn how to use new dynamic array functions, create flexible lookup formulas, and practice using statistical functions. In essence, it's where you learn the real data analysis tools, and it could save you a ton of time in any role that involves large data sets. 

Excel isn't the only star of the show. Word may feel like the simplest software in the set, but there are a ton of advanced features you might not know about yet. The Word 2021 course shows you how to access document templates, customize your work interface, and polish your work to a professional shine. 

Don't know if a video course is the right fit for you? Preview some of the videos to get an idea of what's in store. Each course is video-led and packed with practice exercises to help you retain what you learn. You'll even get a certificate of completion when you finish the course. These certificates are different from an official certification, but they could still be useful if you want to show an employer you mean business.

Become an Office expert

Go beyond the basics and use Microsoft apps like a true professional. 

Get the Ultimate Microsoft Office 2021/365 Training Bundle on sale for £30.38. 

StackSocial prices subject to change. 

I was all about the wedding bells after getting engaged in June, but after seeing some of these wedding venue quotes, it’s more like alarm bells.

"Ding-dong" has been remixed to "cha-ching" – and I need help.

I don’t even know how to begin wedding planning. What are the first steps? What do I need to prioritize first? Which tasks are pressing – and which can wait a year or two?

I decided to enlist the help of an AI assistant. Taking it one step further, I thought it’d be interesting to see which chatbot – Gemini Advanced or ChatGPT Plus (i.e., ChatGPT 4o) – is the better wedding planner.

Gemini vs ChatGPT: Create a to-do list

I’m planning on have my wedding in the summer of 2026 – sometime between August and September. Besides that, I don’t have anything else nailed down, so I asked both Gemini and ChatGPT to give me a to-do list based on the following prompt:

“My wedding is between August 2026 and September 2026. Give me a to-do list of things to do for the remainder of 2024, 2025, and 2026 for a 100-guest wedding.”

ChatGPT's response: ChatGPT's response Credit: Kimberly Gedeon / Mashable Gemini's response: Gemini's response Credit: Kimberly Gedeon / Mashable

Both kicked off their lists accurately: setting a budget is a crucial first step. However, the problem with Gemini's response is that it recommends venue hunting before drafting a guest list. You can't search for wedding places without having a rough idea of your guest count. One of the first things venue coordinators ask is, "How many people are coming to your wedding?"

Interestingly, ChatGPT wants me to take the early-bird approach. It recommended booking my venue in 2024 and finalizing other vendors (e.g., florist, entertainment, and photographers) in 2025. Gemini, on the other hand, is OK with both being booked in 2025. ChatGPT wants me set up a registry in 2025 and obtain a marriage license in 2025; Gemini, on the other hand, is fine with me procrastinating on the former until 2026 — and mentions nothing about a marriage license.

To be fair, though, ChatGPT didn't mention anything about honeymoon planning.

Both agree that 2025 is the year I should go wedding dress shopping and send save-the dates. In 2026, both advise to send out invitations and confirm bookings with vendors.

ChatGPT offered helpful tips that I hadn't considered before, including using a folder or binder to organize quotes, contracts, and ideas in one place and creating a wedding-day timeline.

Winner: ChatGPT

Gemini vs ChatGPT: Find a cheap venue

I was curious to see if Gemini Advanced and ChatGPT Plus could help me find a bang-for-your-buck venue within my budget (i.e., $20,000).

After searching the far corners of the internet, I found some venues, at less than $20,000, that offer all-inclusive packages, including the DJ and master of ceremonies, limousine service, florist, cake, and photographer.

As such, I tested Gemini Advanced and ChatGPT Plus to see if they could find these locations with the following prompt:

"Find a venue that falls within my budget of $20,000 that offers a complete wedding package. The venue should be located in Queens, Long Island, or within the Hudson River Valley area at most. My guest count is 100. My wedding is in 2026, with a preference for months between August and September. Sunday weddings are OK, as well as Saturday weddings. It doesn't matter whether it's daytime or nighttime."

ChatGPT's response ChatGPT's response Credit: Kimberly Gedeon / Mashable

These are wedding venues that I've seen during my research that offer gorgeous, visually stunning weddings without demanding exorbitant expenses.

Pavilion at Sunken Meadow State Park does, indeed, have a complete wedding package, with a starting price of $18,000. I'm not sure if Bourne Mansion and Larkfield have complete wedding packages, but the latter quoted me $110 per-person for a 100-guest afternoon wedding, which comes with food and a wedding cake. Including the $1,500 ceremony fee, that comes out to a subtotal of $12,500.

Did it miss other budget-friendly venues I've discovered during my research? Yes, but it's on the right track.

Gemini, on the other hand, shocked me — and not in a good way. Gemini is a Google-owned service, so I thought it'd be able to tap into its vast treasure trove of information to beat ChatGPT. Instead, Gemini delivered a rather disappointing, lazy answer.

Gemini's response Gemini Advanced's response Credit: Kimberly Gedeon / Mashable

Leonard's Palazzo is a wedding venue I've received a personalized quote for while venue hunting. They do not offer a complete wedding package, but while throwing in the food and the cake, they quoted me about $16,000 for a 100-guest ceremony and reception. Not bad!

The Manhattan-based recommendations are a head scratcher because they're not in my desired region. (At least Andaz 5th Ave is within the ballpark of my budget.)

And then, Gemini had the audacity to say, "I hope this helps!" Is it trolling me?

Winner: ChatGPT

Gemini vs ChatGPT: Calculate pricing

Both Gemini Advanced and ChatGPT Plus can "read" PDFs and screenshots, making them ideal AI assistants for making sense of confusing pricing charts (as well as the small-text taxes and gratuities within them that need to be tacked on to the base cost).

Here's an example of one of the many charts I ran into while venue shopping:

2025 pricing list for Whitby Castle Credit: Kimberly Gedeon / Mashable

I decided to test Gemini and ChatGPT's ability to make calculations based on the above PDF.

"Check out this 2025 wedding price list. Based on a date between August 2025 and September 2025 on Sunday at noontime, and a guest list of 100 adults, calculate the full total. We will have the ceremony on site. Include the administrative fee, NY sales tax, suggested gratuities, and bridal attendant fee."

Gemini Advanced offered a total of $21,017 while ChatGPT Plus posted $20,568.69. Why are the totals different? The former added the bridal attendant fee of $400 in the subtotal before tacking on the 22% administration fee.

ChatGPT, on the other hand, applied the 22% administration fee only to the base cost (i.e., $130 x 100 guests) and ceremony fee — and then it added the $400 bridal attendant fee. Based on how other venues have quoted me, it seems like ChatGPT's calculation is more accurate.

Winner: ChatGPT

Gemini vs ChatGPT: Image generation of wedding concept

I asked Gemini and ChatGPT to generate an image of a wedding reception concept based on the following prompt:

"My fiancé and I are tech journalists who are, of course, obsessed with tech, including laptops, phones, VR headsets, gaming, XR glasses, etc. We also love space, and we’re leaning toward some sort of celestial vibe for our wedding. Generate an image of a wedding reception beautifully conveys this wedding theme and design."

ChatGPT's image ChatGPT's interpretation of a tech-focused, galaxy-themed wedding Credit: ChatGPT / Open AI Gemini's images Gemini's interpretation of a tech-focused, galaxy-themed wedding Credit: Gemini / Google

Gemini's interpretation of a tech-focused, galaxy-themed wedding Credit: Gemini / Google

Gemini's interpretation of a tech-focused, galaxy-themed wedding Credit: Gemini / Google

ChatGPT delivered one image and nailed what I'm looking for. Gemini churned out three, and only one of them, just the first one, caught my eye.

ChatGPT, however, generated the most eye-catching image.

Winner: ChatGPT

Gemini vs ChatGPT: Creativity based on wedding favor ideas

Finally, we asked Gemini Advanced and ChatGPT Plus for wedding favor ideas.

"My fiancé and I want to get cheap tech-product wedding favors. Give us 10 techy wedding favor ideas that will delight our guests."

ChatGPT's list

1. Customized USB Drives:

2. Portable Phone Chargers:

3. LED keychains

4. Earbuds

5. Smartphone PopSockets

6. Mini Bluetooth Speakers

7. Touchscreen Gloves

8. Digital Photo Frames

9. VR Cardboard Headsets

10. Fitness Tracker Bracelets

Gemini's list

1. Personalized USB drivers

2. Mini Bluetooth speakers

3. Phone Ring Holders

4. Custom Phone PopSockets

5. Portable Power Banks

6. LED Flashing Badges

7. Selfie Ring Lights

8. Miniature LED projectors

9. Card-Sized Multitools

10. Wireless Charging Pads

Portable phone chargers, earbuds, mini bluetooth speakers, and fitness tracker bracelets caught my eye on ChatGPT's list. Similarly, on Gemini's list, mini bluetooth speakers, portable power banks, and wireless charging pads grabbed my attention.

Unfortunately for Gemini, ChatGPT won this round, too.

Winner: ChatGPT

Gemini vs ChatGPT: Winner

ChatGPT Plus mopped the floor with Gemini Advanced in this face-off. To my surprise, ChatGPT had more thoughtful, research-based responses compared to Gemini.

ChatGPT Plus costs $20 month; Gemini Advanced is also $20 a month.

ChatGPT $0.00 at ChatGPT
Get Deal Google Gemini $0.00 at Google Gemini
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It turns out Windows 11 users won't be able to uninstall Microsoft's controversial "Recall" feature after all.

Recall is a Copilot+ feature announced in May that essentially takes constant screenshots of your behavior while using operating system, ostensibly for users to easily find previous work.

A report by Deskmodder seemed to reveal recent Windows 11 update 24H2 allows users to completely uninstall the feature. But now, in a statement to The Verge, Microsoft clarified that that the uninstall option was just a bug.

"We are aware of an issue where Recall is incorrectly listed as an option under the 'Turn Windows features on or off' dialog in Control Panel," said Windows senior product manager Brandon LeBlanc to the outlet. "This will be fixed in an upcoming update."

When Microsoft announced Recall, it was intended to be baked into Windows 11's functions. The feature tracks everything you do on compatible Windows PCs and uses an on-device generative AI model to retrieve particular information a user is looking for, by filing through a library of screenshots saved on the device. Critics of the feature immediately pointed out that it is highly susceptible to cybersecurity flaws since it indiscriminately saves sensitive information like passwords, confidential work, and personal information.

Former Microsoft security expert Kevin Beaumont described it as a cybersecurity "disaster."

"Stealing everything you’ve ever typed or viewed on your own Windows PC is now possible with two lines of code," said Beaumont.

SEE ALSO: Microsoft's new AI 'Recall' feature is like hitting 'CTRL + H' on your entire digital life

The public backlash to the new feature led to Microsoft just days after its May announcement following up with a new statement that the Recall feature would be opt-in and therefore switched off by default.

It is also being investigated by the UK's Information Commissioner's Office (ICO) for violations of user privacy. But after all the outcry and potential legal ramifications,

Recall was initially slated for release in June, but was delayed as Microsoft scrambled to address security concerns. Now, it will launch in October to Windows Insiders testers.

After Aggro Dr1ft last year, Harmony Korine has once again made the most galaxy-brained movie of the Venice International Film Festival, Baby Invasion. A work that takes the form of a messed up livestream, the filmmaker's new video game-inspired nightmare is wildly, oppressively hypnotic, even though it eventually runs out of places to go.

The edgelords at Korine's vowel-less EDGLRD production house feel less like traditional filmmakers, more like a collective of media enthusiasts running wackadoodle experiments. Observe them from afar and you might find pretentious faux-intellectualism on the future of cinema; Korine claims that this is what movies will soon be like. It's a hard notion to take seriously.

SEE ALSO: 42 movies you'll want to see this fall

But should you choose to submit to the work regardless, you'll be treated to a stunning example of what movies can be right now, with a strong dose of eerie premonition about where the world at large might be headed — if it isn't already there.

What is Baby Invasion about?

Baby Invasion opens with a brief interview clip with a fictitious Filipina game developer — who, for some strange reason, doesn't remove her VR headset. She explains the concept for a game she created that was unfortunately leaked on the internet: a first-person-shooter (FPS) in which assailants disguise their faces with those of babies. Furthermore, its popularity on some corners of the web inspired people to go out and re-create its core concept in real life, and broadcast their crimes via livestream.

This deeply fucked-up idea is, in its entirety, the movie's premise. It takes the form of screenlife cinema, from the point of view of someone watching and interacting with one such online stream, though given that the eponymous baby invaders wear helmet-mounted cameras, the film itself may as well be a first-person shooter movie, like Hardcore Henry. Using AI facial filters (à la TikTok and Snapchat), a cult-like group dressed in horned black hoodies obscure their appearance with the trend-requisite images of baby faces, as they collect ammunition and travel between various Florida mansions in a covert van.

The screen is filled with a Twitch-like scrolling community chat on the left-hand side (in various languages, and with its own memes and internal lingo), alongside graphics and other statistical displays. However, at very few points is the actual audio of this stream ever heard. Instead, it's overlaid with an extremely lengthy, constantly morphing rave track by producer Burial, accompanied by whispers about a rabbit-like creature. As the film's parameters become clear, so too does that of the streamers, who point their guns at wealthy hostages for fun and — it would seem — commit grisly murders just off-screen.

"Crimson towel!" numerous viewers type into the chat, referring to the blood-soaked face coverings over filmed bodies strewn about, as though this were some familiar trope or community reaction. The assailants' baby disguises may be strange, but they're hardly the most perverse part of the whole affair: that would be the casual cruelty and dehumanization on display in the stream, towards women in particular, which becomes part of the movie's self-reflexive point.

Baby Invasion taps into distinctly modern forms of violence

As with the video game influences in Aggro Dr1ft, Korine appears fixated with the collision of gaming and real-world violence. Of course, the idea that video games are some root cause of violent outbursts has long been exaggerated, but the movie, like video games themselves, exists in a violent world that adopts the language of mass media. More tame real-world examples include video creators impersonating Grand Theft Auto, and streamers pretending to be video game characters (specifically NPCs or "non-playable characters") and accepting input via emojis.

Unfortunately, this adoption of gaming language has a darker side. For instance, NPC has become an epithet meant to imply someone is devoid of personality or humanity, which is the next logical step in an online culture intent on dehumanizing its targets. In Baby Invasion, distressed hostages immediately have their reactions screencapped and turned into memes, reducing their plight to content meant for easy consumption. The closer they are to being killed, the more filters are applied to their person, obscuring their humanity.

The more the movie lingers in this first-person perspective, the more it disturbingly places viewers in the mindset of such terrorists, and in doing so, Baby Invasion calls to mind real mass shootings and violent crimes which have been livestreamed — the Christchurch mosque shooting that was streamed live on YouTube and Facebook, and a Michigan murder that was broadcast on Facebook are just two examples.

If there's something missing from Baby Invasion, it's the actual, sickening outcomes of the crimes themselves. The victims are living, breathing people in one moment, gone the next, with the actual act of execution having been obscured. Perhaps it's a violation of the guidelines of the fictional streaming platforms of the film themselves, but this missing piece is thematically vital too. Should we, as viewers, want to see the complete picture? Without realizing it, we might be complicit in Korine's portrait of a world gone mad as soon as we realize there's more to the story, and something we're prevented from seeing.  

Baby Invasion is an arresting experience — up to a point

The film is also self-reflexive about who its audience is, and who the participants in the stream might be. A small window pops up on occasion, with teens in colorful skull masks watching the stream, as though it were from their vantage (or on their screens) that the film was playing out. Not only does the movie dictate who its audience is — in terms of their macabre desires, and how they mold themselves — but it speculates on who the shooters might be in the strangest fashion. The stream boots up with an EDGLRD logo. The shooters wear EDGLRD insignia, and the horns they wear resemble the masks worn in Aggro Dr1ft. Are they fans who might've misinterpreted that movie as a call to violence, or simply adopted its aesthetics?

Korine is just as culpable as the rest of the culture, it would seem. But this is, in a way, freeing for him as a filmmaker. It verges on offering Korine carte blanche to do, essentially, whatever he wants in the realm of cinematic debauchery. As much as the screen may be cluttered by graphics and text, there's a distinct realism to the online world we see, and how the people within it interact and operate. We don't see much of the bloodshed in the moment, though the movie does feature disturbing flashes of what appears to be separate stabbing attacks shot with a more rudimentary camera — as though this were some flashback or memory, or ghost in the machine.

However, there are times when the very reality of the film is called into question, rendering the aforementioned stabbing a potential peek into the real world from, perhaps, an unreal one. The game designer in the prologue talks about her intent to blur the virtual and real worlds, and the entrancing effect of Baby Invasion often does just that, lulling its more willing viewers into a state of arrest, to the point that even its most realistic images become mere stimuli. But then the stream takes odd turns, and the shooters find themselves in a metaverse of sorts, peeking out at the real events they perpetrate. Perhaps this is some quirk of the stream or real life "game" — we are, at the end of the day, witnessing what other viewers might see on a screen — but there are also moments where digital recreations of real environments so closely resemble the real thing that it's genuinely hard to tell the difference.

Figuring out the distinction (or even wanting to) is sort of irrelevant. Baby Invasion doesn't exactly have a plot beyond the shooters' violent depravity, and so there's only so long one can be swept up in its techno madness, despite its mere 80-minute runtime. However, that it takes these detours at all is terrifying enough, and provides just enough room for speculation. In a movie where desensitization lies at the root of everything, the notion of whether something feels real (regardless of whether it is) becomes the most pressing question. If fiction can be made to feel like reality, then so too can reality become fiction, giving way to everything from conspiracy theories to bullets and bloodshed.

Baby Invasion was reviewed out of its world premiere at the Venice International Film Festival.

The US Open broadcast suddenly cut out for DirecTV customers on Sunday evening due to contract dispute with Disney.

Disney blocked access to ESPN, ABC, and other Disney-owned channels for the roughly 11 million DirecTV subscribers after ongoing distribution negotiations went sour. The blackout occurred right before the college football season opener with LSU versus USC. That the hardball tactic occurred during primetime at the US Open and right before the start of the NFL season is no coincidence since it motivates both parties to reach a deal. However, that also means when negotiations fall through, millions of customers suffer the consequences.

According to a statement from DirecTV, "Disney is forcing consumers to pay for channels they don't watch," while DirecTV wants to offer customers more flexibility in terms of the channels they wish to pay for. "Disney's only magic is forcing prices to go up while simultaneously making its content disappear," said said Rob Thun, chief content officer in the press release.

SEE ALSO: How to watch the NFL online for free

According to a statement from Disney, they're willing to offer flexibility of channels, but "will not enter into an agreement that undervalues our portfolio of television channels and programs." Exactly, a year ago Disney pulled the same move with cable company Spectrum, which resulted in a 10-day blackout. So one thing is certain: during one of the biggest sports broadcasting moments of the year, customers are losing out.

Customers took to X to express their anger and willingness to cancel their account if it's not resolved.

Tweet may have been deleted

While DirecTV is the one shouldering the blame, and by extension losing customers, users called out Disney as the "root cause" and the "villains" since it's the party that owns the channels and is holding out for more money.

Tweet may have been deleted Tweet may have been deleted

Meanwhile, amidst the ongoing battle between DirecTV and Disney, streaming platforms that don't require cable subscriptions like YouTube TV and Fubo are sitting back with popcorn.

Tweet may have been deleted

I never imagined a dating app could make me feel guilty.

But there I was, sitting on my sofa, worrying if I was, to quote indie pop band London Grammar, wasting my young years.

It had been a difficult week, to say the least. I was sleep-deprived and my anxiety was running riot. What I needed most right then and there was a quiet, restorative night of doing nothing. I was hiding under a blanket on my sofa when my phone started flashing like a lighthouse on the horizon.

Four Hinge notifications appeared on my home screen in close succession. I had a new match named Jake. My eye scrolled downwards to see that Jake wasn't wasting any time: He wanted to meet up. Right now.

I really didn't want to do that. It was 9 p.m. and I was in my pyjamas watching Bridgerton. The last thing I wanted to do was leave the house for what felt like a booty call. My instinct was to put myself first on this night. But that came with a small kick of guilt that I was somehow failing at dating.

SEE ALSO: Why some people on dating apps just want to be 'pen pals'

I couldn't seem to shake the feeling that I was boring and a tiny bit selfish for wanting to stay home. You'll be alone forever at this rate, whispered a small voice in my head. How had a message from a stranger had this effect on me? Truth is, Jake is one of many guys in my phone asking to meet up straight after matching.

Dating app interactions are becoming increasingly fast-paced. That palpable culture shift is a reaction against the "swiping fatigue" that began to plague the dating industry in 2018. This swiping ennui resulted in daters collecting countless matches, but having low-quality interactions that didn't lead to an actual in-person date. "Breadcrumbing" — a term for daters who have interminable chats with their matches with zero intention of meeting up — became a scourge for people genuinely looking for love, not a penpal. Daters became more and more frustrated with accumulating matches who didn't seem serious about testing the waters offline.

Now the pendulum has swung so far in the opposite direction, we may have overcorrected. But we can fix this. We can bring balance back to the online dating world by being honest about preferring to chat online before meeting up IRL. If you're in need of self-care and don't feel like explaining why, then don't. If your schedule is packed, suggest alternatives like voice-noting or FaceTime. It is 100 percent OK to say no when a match wants to meet up straight away. Spare yourself the guilt, if you can.

As for me, I had nothing against Jake. But I'd had zero conversation with him, so I had absolutely no idea whether we were even a good match personality-wise. I weighed whether I wanted to expend the mental energy of explaining the reasons why I couldn't meet up right now. But, to be frank, I just didn't feel like it. I didn't have to explain anything. I ignored the request, stowed away my phone and hit play on my TV remote.

A few days later — and feeling well-rested after several nights on the sofa — I spotted a tweet that really spoke to me. Poorna Bell, an author and journalist who writes about mental health, tweeted that if a match asks to meet up with very little notice, "don't feel guilty or like you'll miss out on 'the one' if you don't. Work to your own timeline."

Tweet may have been deleted

"I know it’s not as simple as this but the right person will wait," Bell added. "The right person will understand you have a life and aren’t egotistical to assume you’d drop everything to meet with a random. And time with yourself even if that’s on the sofa with Netflix is as important."

I knew from talking to friends that I was far from alone in feeling this way. But Bell's tweet made me feel validated in the decision I'd made that night.

On-demand dating has been on the rise for some time. Couple that with the growing frustration with breadcrumbing and swiping fatigue and it makes sense that some people are trying to seal the deal and land a date straight away. This change in dating culture might explain why more and more daters are sliding into your inbox asking to meet up straight away.

Dating apps have also played a part in this gear-shift. Some popular apps are actively encouraging users to meet up sooner. Naomi Walkland, associate director for Europe and Middle East marketing at Bumble, told Mashable that "getting asked out on a date shortly after you have matched with someone online can sometimes be overwhelming."

SEE ALSO: People are using AI to date you

"At Bumble, we encourage people to meet as soon as you can," Walkland added. "This is one of the reasons why we have a 24-hour window for replies so that it keeps the momentum going with you and your match." After this finite period ends, the match expires and it's no longer possible to get in touch. There is the option of extending that window, particularly if you don't have "first move privileges" (a Bumble feature which allows only one person to break the ice first).

Hinge's CMO Nathan Roth echoed these sentiments. "In today’s digital world, singles are so busy matching that they’re not actually connecting, in person, where it counts," Roth told Mashable. "As the dating app that’s 'designed to be deleted,' we’re always encouraging our users to move things offline and go on a great date," Roth continued.

While dating culture has shifted to combat swiping fatigue, not all online daters are on board with the newfound immediacy.

Adele, a home healthcare assistant who prefers to use only her first name as her surname is very recognisable, told me she feels "absolutely terrified, with a side of suspicion" when a match wants to meet up straight away.

She does not, however, feel pressured to meet up. "Especially with some of the horror stories you see, as well as my own experiences with online dating, my safety and comfort is the first thing I think of," Adele said. "If they immediately push to meet and don't even have like, a brief chat online first then I absolutely won’t go meet them."

She does a "full vetting first" and prefers to see their Facebook and Instagram profiles before meeting up. "I've been out with quite a few guys via online dating and the nice, reasonable ones have completely understood that when you’re a lone woman going to meet a stranger for a date, you want to be as safe as possible," she added. "My advice would be: If they have an issue with you saying no to meeting immediately then just steer well clear. Anyone worth seeing would understand."

Sam Espensen, a spirits producer, used to feel pressured by matches, particularly when the other person is persistently pushing to meet up. She did say yes once, but then cancelled a few hours before the date. "My Spidey Sense was tingling and it turned out to be correct — the person in question turned out to be majorly flawed," she said, clarifying that they were "aggressive and stalkery and wouldn’t take no for an answer and refused to understand why women would be nervous about meeting someone straight away."

She offered some great advice for anyone who might also be feeling pressured.

"Step back and think about why they're pressuring you," she said. "If they really like the sound of you, they'll put some leg work in and communicate online/on the phone for a while before meeting up." She said that anyone putting pressure on you at such an early stage is likely to do so in the future. "If they're being really pushy, they probably don't think you'll agree to meeting with them after speaking online for a while first. And they may have bad intentions," she added.

If you do want to meet up with this person, you could consider telling them you're bringing a friend, Sam suggested. "Their reaction will tell you everything you need to know!"

There are other ways of "meeting" without having to take the step of meeting up in person. Some daters use WhatsApp voice notes to "pre-screen" their dates before meeting up IRL. Chatting over voice notes, if you're comfortable with it, can provide the opportunity to get a sense of your match's personality ahead of arranging a date. If your schedule is jam-packed, you could also try a quick video chat on FaceTime. Bumble also has a video calling feature so you can chat face-to-face over the app without disclosing your mobile number. If you notice a spark while voicenoting or video-chatting, try moving things into an in-person date.

Dating culture is in high-gear, but you don't need to drop everything just to keep pace. There will be times in everyone's life where meeting up immediately doesn't work. Sometimes your busy work schedule won't sync up with a match's. Other times, your calendar might be free as a bird, but you're in desperate need of downtime. The right person will understand. Don't feel bad about putting yourself first.

This article was first published in 2020 and republished in 2024.

Channin Tatum and Naomi Ackie appeared on BBC Radio 1 to play "Unpopular Opinion" with callers.

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